Monday, May 24, 2010

After the culminating activity of our summer workshop, kalligrafia

" ate mich 10 am bukas sa computer lab ha,"
ito ang mga salitang madalas n'yang binabanggit.

Siya ang tipo ng taong madaling makisama,
napakabait pero wag nyong susubukan
ang kanyang pasensya dahil
kung anong ikinabuti niya
siya ring ikina"taray" niya.

Hindi naging hadlang sa kanya
ang pagkakaroon ng titulong "guro"
para makibagay at makisama
sa kanyang estudyante.
Siya yung taong mappamahal
at tatatak talaga sa puso mo.

Madalas tanaw nyo na agad siya sa malayo
dahil sa kanyang puting salamin,
malalaking hikaw at kulot na buhok.
Siya ang aking guro na si Ms. Veran.

Kahit sa panahong iniisip namin
na wala na kaming pag-asa
andyan sya, patuloy kaming pinpursige.
Naniniwala siya sa aming mga kakayahan.

Kahit madalas kaming magkamali
hindi siya nagsasawang tulungan at pakinggan kami.
Ma'am maraming salamat po sa lahat.
You made my summer unforgettable.


i love you ma'am! :-D




sms message from Michelle Deceda

Saturday, May 22, 2010

I passed!

i am happy i passed the board exam which I took last April 18..
after 3 months of hard work and mind boggling, restless, pressured environment i had..

thank you to my bf because he was the first supporter...as he always did...
thanks for my family who believed in me...
thanks for my friends, Mafe and Borj who understood me and backed me up whenever needed..
thank you for my journ kids and students who made things easier for me...
thank you for mam kathy for the chitchats that eases the stress...

sorry if i forgot your names but thanks for all the prayers and mass...

thanks ate elaine, aljer, ate aileen, sir marlon, hay di ko na alam basta salamat...

i'm super happy...

thanks also for my review buddies, ariane, dhes, aries..lucky, anna..
thanks for the nightingale review center and our instructors..:)

Friday, May 21, 2010

Magkita na kasi tayo...

ang sarap sana ng tulog ko
ngunit sa aking paggising
narinig ko ang kanyang boses
nagagalak na ako'y nakausap

parang boses nya'y
isang pananabik para sa aking tenga
isang kagalakan ng aking puso
isang pagbuo muli sa aking kaibuturan

hinahagkan niya ako kanina
wari'y nasa tabi niya ako
ngunit isang pagkukunwari
sa kalayuang di magiging malapit

napanaginipan ko siya
na yakap yakap niya akong mahigpit
na wari'y isang tunay na kaganapan
sana di ko na lamang naimulat aking mga mata

hay, nakalulungkot pa rin
nag-iwan siya ng mensahe
nakit daw di ko siya hinahalikan pabalik
hindi ko kasi kaya pa ang pait

gusto ko na kasi siyang puntahan
gusto rin niya na puntahan ako
oras lang talaga ang pumipigil
konting linggo na lang aking hihintayin.




tulog na tayo



matutulog na ako ng ganitong kaaga..para mabasawan ang nararamdamang sakit at hapdi ng paghihintay sa iniirog..sana sa paggising ko ay katabi ko na siyang muli..

Kwentuhan muna tayo..

nakatingin sa harap ng computer. parang may hinihintay. pero wala namang dumarating. wala ding mensahe.

dumating pa si tatay. di makapag-type ng nais sabihin. pampasira ng moment. ano ba 'yun. abala. wala naman ako magagawa kasi nagshe-share ng hinaing. pero nakakapagod na rin kasi. paulit-ulit. sawang-sawa. istorbo. hindi ko naman pedeng sabihin. kc tatay ko siya. wala na si nanay. hay ano ba ulit ito. nakakasakit ng puso at ng isip.

hayan nakatingin ulit sa harap ng computer. bukas, Neil Gaiman sa akin ka na! pero dami ko pang nabiling libro nung nakalipas na hindi ko pa mabasa. di ko na alam kung ano ang uunahin.

gusto ko pang magbakasyon. pero in fairness masaya din ako kahit malungkot. kasi sa tuwing umaga na gigising ako. may magtetext sa akin. nagtatanong, mam, san tau ngaun. at least may nakaalala. someone is needing din pala.

pero isa lang ngayon ang need ko. isa lang. siya lang. pero hindi nya alam lahat ito. ayaw niya kasi sa social networking. di nya rin alam na nagba-blog ako. nung isang araw lang. ang dami pala niyang di alam din sa akin. misteryoso din pala ako.

hay tama na nga. emo na naman ako ng ganitong mode.

basta mahal ko siya.

at alam kong mahal pa rin niya ako. busy lang siya sa work.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Pahila ng Manila sa Lucena

Sana malapit lang

ang maynila

Sana malapit lang

siya

Ang sakit

ng malayo

siya

Parang bawat

minuto

ninanakaw

ng iba

ang lahat

ng magagandang

bagay

na nangyayari

sa knaya

na dapat ay

sa akin


ang lupit

ang sakit

ang hapdi


na wari'y

di ko na

siya

kilala

Eto akong


nagdaramdam

naghihintay

nananalangin


na sana'y

nadito

siya

kapiling ako

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Ako ba ito?

hindi pa rin maka-get over

sa panahong tayo'y magkasama

hay ewan ba

maikling panahong lamang

naman tayo'y nagdaupang palad

hay

buwiset...

sensya hindi ako galit

ngunit sa iyong pagdating

ako'y namulat

na hindi sapat

ang aking nalalaman

ewan ba

ganun lamang palang

kaunti ang butong

itinanim sa akin ng

aking mga guro

kulang pa

hay..

gusto ko tuloy

magwala

lumabas

masaksihan

ang mundo

na

maganda

mapait

magulo

marahas

ewan

gusto ko tuloy

mag-risk

sa lahat lahat


tigil muna


ako ba ito

o dahil

nagugustuhan lang

ang idea


marahil

ewan

basta

alam kong

madami pa

akong malalaman

sa darating

na panahon

kailangan lang

imulat

ang mga mata

at laksan

ang pandinig

kelangan sumaksi


kailangan

kong kayanin

ang lahat lahat



sana nga..

Monday, May 17, 2010

I LOVE YOU

i love you

and i cant stop

saying this

a

million times

i never

wanted this

to last

it will

only break my

heart

but missing

you now

is making

me

terribly ill

i'm grasping

myself

back

without you

i feel

i am

an empty

vessel

an empty

soul

longing

the one

who

can

fill me

up

with

love,

joy

i wish

i could

see you

now

to be

with you

now

i am

really longing

for

you


i love you

daddy..

---

for gino

Ending the Summer Workshop

The end.


Really?
How far can it be?
I will really miss them.

I know.

But like words that they weave
they have to be freed
people should know that they exist

Like pictures they captured
they have to be appreciated
people should know their talents.

I think..

It is the beginning..


---
for my journ "kids"...




Sunday, May 16, 2010

Because We loved the Moon Tonight

for Megan...
because she loves Pablo Neruda

In My Sky At Twilight

In my sky at twilight you are like a cloud
and your form and colour are the way I love them.
You are mine, mine, woman with sweet lips
and in your life my infinite dreams live.

The lamp of my soul dyes your feet,
the sour wine is sweeter on your lips,
oh reaper of my evening song,
how solitary dreams believe you to be mine!

You are mine, mine, I go shouting it to the afternoon's
wind, and the wind hauls on my widowed voice.
Huntress of the depth of my eyes, your plunder
stills your nocturnal regard as though it were water.

You are taken in the net of my music, my love,
and my nets of music are wide as the sky.
My soul is born on the shore of your eyes of mourning.
In your eyes of mourning the land of dreams begin.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Trying A New Kind of Beverage

mmm..

dahil matagal na dapat naka-sked na magluto ng gulaman para ma-itry ang commercial ng Nescafe..na coffee plus coffeemate na may yelo at sago't gulaman, e magluluto na ako ngayon..

mmm..

instead daw na coffeemate eh gatas na lang gagawin ni tatay..at instead na plain sugar eh ika-cameralize ko un..

sige tingnan natin kung ano ang resulta..

babush..

---
madami pa akong kwento mamamaya..mwah..

Deep Night

Deep Night. I cannot sleep.

I get up and sing softly to my lute.

Moonlight glows in the gauze curtains.

I open my night gown, and let

The fresh night air bathe my body.

A lonely wild goose cries out

In the distant meadow.

A night bird flies calling through the trees.

I come and go without rest.

What do I gain by it?

My mind is distracted by worries

That will never cease.

My heart is all bruised.

By the troubled ghosts who haunt it.

-Yuan Chi

Sa harap ng Monitor

I am getting pissed off waiting for time..i am starting to get mad at him...Even he said he'll be on low batt


hirap ng naghihintay ha..kakabuwiset..


buti pa ang monitor..alam ang pagkainip ko..

I Do Not Love You Except Because I Love You


By Pablo Neruda

(translation unknown)

I do not love you except because I love you;
I go from loving to not loving you,
From waiting to not waiting for you
My heart moves from cold to fire.

I love you only because it's you the one I love;
I hate you deeply, and hating you
Bend to you, and the measure of my changing love for you
Is that I do not see you but love you blindly.

Maybe January light will consume
My heart with its cruel
Ray, stealing my key to true calm.

In this part of the story I am the one who
Dies, the only one, and I will die of love because I love you,
Because I love you, Love, in fire and blood.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Sana di ka na lang umalis

Eto naka-hang
Hindi ko mapigilang
Mag-isip
Bakit mo ba ako
Na-capture
Nabihag kumbaga

Buwisit

Di kita matiis
Di kita pedeng
Pabayaan
Baka makuha ka pa
Ng iba
Pero di ko alam
Kung akin
Ka ba talaga
Baka kasi
Ako lang
Ito
Nag-eexpect
Pero wala
Pala talaga

Hay

Ano ba
Talaga
Ito
Sana
Akin ka
Na lang
Pero hindi
Panaginip
Lamang kita
Malayo sa
Katotohanan
Ang may alam lang
Ay ang aking
Keyboard
Monitor
at CPU na magtatago
Ng Lihim ko
Na napaibig mo
Ako
Khit
Isang saglit
Lamang
Kitang nakilala

Paalam

Here Comes The Bride

Just arrived home. We watched Here Comes The Bride. I had a good laugh..super good laugh..

Well this movie is about 5 souls...mmm..I dont want to be unfair with people who would like to watch the movie..:) so I will leave this for you to watch..

Anyway, speaking of souls...if a soul is really connected with other souls, I am in a realization or maybe Im drafting or connecting the dots where did my family roots are drawn..(naks)

This week I have learned a lot..not only with poetry but also with a little bit of myself..
Well, I had the chance to meet some of the writers here in Lucena and I dont know it was really amazing that from the session (drinking session) that we had, I will find out that my family is really into education..Though I love the comment that we really have good eyes.

With that session too, I came to realize that I need to read more and to learn more..I came to realize to that not everything I learned is school is enough; experience and the networks you have will lead you to a more particular/specific/different lessons in life.

Patawa rin kasi, I came to realize that now that I have a year left of being single, I need to know about more of myself including my roots. I would like to explore more, to learn more, to do things that if not done will become a regret to me in the future./p>


enough of this..:))